Belgian GP - "Nice one boys"

Oui

Scuderia Principe Pitstop's Gary Anderson impressions - "When I worked at Jordan we always used wheels."
Scuderia Principe Pitstop is also pleased to see that Ricciardo has had his braces removed

(SPP very much padding out this blog)

Non

Williams qualifying - all I ask is consistent rain
Vettel's first lap overtake - the world's heart sank
DRS overtakes - there's no need in Spa, mid-way through the race, Alonso had managed five overtakes without DRS
Driver radio - "Yellow cheese seven", "Checo, we think the best strategy is to push and get ahead of the cars in front."
Gary Anderson - "There's probably a problem somewhere"
Stewards - punishing Maldonado unfairly
DC's' podium interview technique - 1) quote a statistic 2) ask for a response

Admin

I have coming to have to begin  concerted effort to claim entrance fees from some teams.  Can you contact me if you haven't paid/have been wrongly listed?  Or risk disqualification!

Rosberg Benz Over Hamilton
I'm gonna come at you like a spider monkey!
I have Vettel but I want his points
The Sutil Knife

Belgium GP Results

1. Scuderia Principe Pitstop - 802
2. I hate Vettel but I want his points - 769
3. What up Bianchi? - 768
4. Still Chewing - 692
5. The Winner Takes Vet Tel - 690
6. Rosberg Benz Over Hamilton - 689
7. Rowntree's Randoms - 656
8. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 574
9. The Sutil Knife - 551
10. Hippy F1 - 550
11. The Pitstop Princess - 542
12. Schumacher's Ghost - 516
13. Superstars - 462
14. I'm gonna come at you like a spider monkey! - 448
15. The Baldy Biker - 378
16. 100% British Beef Horsepower - 361
17. The Dark Button - 347
18. Year of the Tifosi - 319

Hungary Extra

Our guest blogger would like to draw your attention to this cringeworthy offering from Hamilton:

http://www1.skysports.com/watch/video/sports/formula-1/8845288/hamilton-dedicates-win-to-nicole

 

Surely there must be other people/institutions that he could dedicate his race win to?  Post your ideas as a comment below and we'll see if we can provide him with some inspiration.

Hungarian GP - Banter By Invite

With the Pitstop Princess taking her summer holidays a week before the rest of the paddock, the FF1 championship leader has stepped in to provide your blogging for this event……..

 

"GET IN THERE LEWIS!"

 

On the face of it, events at the 2013 Hungarian Grand Prix panned out to a very familiar script:

 

Qually ends as ever with a Mercedes taking pole and Webber and Di Resta whinging about the car their teams have given them; tyre strategy dominates the majority of the pre-race chat; Vettel ignores team instructions to back off and nearly costs himself points (in this case, tailgating Button); Grosjean looks phenomenal and a potential challenger to the big boys, only to smack into someone (Button) and ruin his podium chances; Alonso is anonymous in the midfield in a below-par, 2011-style Ferrari; one of the Mercedes has a meltdown; and Raikkonen is Mr Consistent, but spends the last laps in a dog fight…..

 

However, this well-worn script is a gripping one (qually aside) and the wheel-to-wheel racing on display by messrs Vettel, Grosjean, Raikkonen, Webber and the ubiquitous Button provided a great spectacle. Sure, Hamilton was never really in any danger of losing the lead short of technical issues, but the top ten order was a dynamic affair. An eventful first lap and ad-hoc tyre strategies meant positions changed hands a fair bit, though with short enough gaps to allow for a contest. There were few lulls and plenty of battles.

 

So, in spite of pole = win and the aforementioned usual patten of event, the last race before summer shutdown served to whet the appetite for the remaining nine rounds. Whilst the finishing order did little to change the championship table, you have to hope that some use this race as a point to reignite their championship hopes (Hamilton and Raikkonen) and other see it as signal for the need to improve when they return at Spa (Alonso/Ferrari).

I'M STILL HUNGARY FOR MORE :

 

"Hey man, I'm trying to focus" - Lewis Hamilton fights back against information overload;

"Kimi, it's Dave" - Lotus appear to now be sending formation lap messages from a Midlands garage;

The magnificent Magyars really know how to reward a winner, presenting hand-me-down china being to the victors…… This year's 'trophy' will be in a charity shop near you soon!

 

BOX, BOX, BOX (and don't let back out the garage):

 

Sky's David 'Crofty' Croft's woeful commentary ("Don't reach for the ice creams yet, there's still a race on");

Paul Di Resta blaming everyone but himself ("Where did that go?!?");

The return of McLaren's 'Tooned' animations, with their borderline racist caricatures….. Maybe the team wouldn't be under performing if they didn't have Whitmarsh, Perez and Co. wasting their time drawing.

 

Note from editor - I'm afraid that despite some excellent writing, our guest blogger has fundamentally failed to provide a true picture of the excitement and overwhelming sense of glorious triumph and revival experienced during the race.  I am, of course, referring to Williams scoring their first point of the season.