Abu Dhabi GP - "Thank you very much for everything"

Prior to the race, Alonso admitted he was pretty happy for this to be his last Honda-powered race.  I think a few folk around were demob happy.

I really enjoyed the amazing driving displayed...in the pre-race aeronautical display.

As for the race itself, I think that must have been as much airtime for Stroll as he has had all year.  And Bottas must be wondering why he barely featured.  He drove a faultless race, driving Hamilton to make an error on Lap 31.  If Mercedes continue to be dominant next season, hopefully he can bring the fight.

Despite a wheel falling off their wagon, Renault finished sixth in the championship.  I'm not sure why Williams didn't receive any love for finishing higher that that.  Or McLaren any criticism for finishing below Haas.

To finish the season, Bottas and Hamilton celebrated with one of my favourites...doughnuts.

(For comments on Massa's retirement, please refer to the 2016 season.)

Abu Dhabi GP - Results

1. Moneyball - 1,186
2. Two World Champions, two future World Champions and, um, two other guys - 1,177
3. No Vices Now - 1,174
4. Hoping for an Indian Summer - 1,088
5. The Pitstop Princess - 1,085
6. Evel Marque - 1,084
7. Jenson's Whinging Legacy - 1,083
8. Even more hopeful - 1,066
9. Bernie is a hobbit - 1,055
10. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 887
11. Burn After Racing - 883
12. BOT-RAI-PER - 776
13. Slightly Slower Racing - 751
14. Hippy F1 - 703

Money in the post to the top three!

Brazil GP - Results

With one race left and all home tracks raced, it's tight at the top...

1. No Vices Now - 1,136*
2. Two World Champions, two future World Champions and, um, two other guys - 1,134*
3. Moneyball - 1,133*
4. The EvePitstop Princess - 1,030*
5. Evel Marque - 1,029*
6. Hoping for an Indian Summer - 1,021*
7. Jenson's Whinging Legacy - 1,008*
8. Bernie is a hobbit - 1,000*
9. Even more hopeful - 991*
10. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 862*
11. Burn After Racing - 855*
12. Slightly Slower Racing - 719*
13. BOT-RAI-PER - 709*
14. Hippy F1 - 641*

*Home track played

Brazil GP - "Daddy, we are so proud of you"

This weekend saw a cracking race.  It got off to a good start with Hamilton in the pits.  Lap one saw Ocon and Grosjean come together, then Van Doorne and Ricciardo triggered a safety car.  There was lots of overtaking but I have no notes from the race??!  I think it was just of a standard we haven't seen in a long, long time.  Even after Vettel crossed the line, there was the battle between Massa, Alonso and Perez to enjoy.

Mexico GP - "Not the race you wanted but who cares"

Another awful start to a race...penalties.  It made a day of the living dead at the back of the grid.  I did enjoy the theme though.

And so to the first lap, Vettel and Hamilton went at each other then Vettel and Verstappen.  So by lap 22, Hamilton was in 19th place with blue flags being waved at him: "it would be quicker for him to let me past and follow".  This is racing, Hamilton and we're all hoping you can't overtake and Vettel can.

Hulkenberg bought sparks to the race, nearly, being instructed that: "the car is not safe...get out by climbing out at the front of the car and jump off".  Hartley and Ericsson later brought real fire to the game.  Interesting retirements this race.

The pressure was getting to Hamilton and he demanded of his team: "when I ask a question, please give me a reply".  He did give us the best battle of the race when he encountered Alonso.  Finishing 9th, he won the world championship and I sincerely hope there'll be Neymar celebs on the radio this season.  Hamilton revealed that at this race, the Mexican fans are the best in the world.  We were also treated to a rare appearance by the Dutch national anthem and as a one off special, there was a special revolving podium introducing a DJ.  Whatever next?

Mexico GP - Results

1. No Vices Now - 1,105*
2. Moneyball - 1,085*
3. Two World Champions, two future World Champions and, um, two other guys - 1,074*
4. Hoping for an Indian Summer - 986*
5. The Pitstop Princess - 985*
6. Evel Marque - 984*
7= Bernie is a hobbit - 955*
7= Jenson's Whinging Legacy - 955*
9. Even More Hopeful - 938*
10. Burn After Racing - 826*
11. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 819*
12. BOT-RAI-PER - 661*
13. Slightly Slower Racing - 635
14. Hippy F1 - 600

* Home track played

US GP - "so proud to be part of it"

With such a dominant pole from Hamilton, I wasn't sure there would be much to watch in the race.  Pleasantly surprised but the ten minutes after the race ended were the most interesting.

The build up was very focused on Hamilton and Mercedes' triumphs and I wonder what they are now going to find to play next week, as the drivers' championship remains undecided.

When Jones announced that there was going to be a showcall, we knew we were in for a treat.  As Mr PSP predicted:...

"presenting...the backmarker...for Sauber...it's..."
"He's the man seeking to finish 21st in this 20 car race..."
"The one, the only, the legend...Wehrlein"

Then they skipped broadcasting the introductions to all the backmarkers!  Ricky Rocket was the only one who really embraced it...even Hamilton looked awkward.

And so the race started and for the first time in a long time, Mr PSP had not accidentally found out who the winner was in advance of watching.  Mainly because for the first time in a very long time, we were watching live.

The start also had a cheesy announcement: "Start your engines", which should really be: "get someone to start your engine".  It was a great start by everyone but especially Vettel, who nailed it and gave everyone hope for a thrilling race ahead.  Ricciardo added to the spice by some really aggressive driving to get past Bottas.  However, lap 6 saw DRS give the pass to Hamilton, followed ten laps later by Ricciardo bowing out.  Less rocket ship and more rocket ice lolly.

I was impressed that Stroll did manage to keep one driver behind him this race...Hartley.

The remaining action came from Raikkonen, passing Bottas, dallying with Verstappen and letting Vettel past: "Seb is now the car behind" - subtle.

Then we went to bed.

Then we watched the rest of the footage to see how and when Verstappen found out he was off the podium.  What an awkward podium room, Raikkonen just showed up and smiled and was literally handed the pink cap from Max's head.  I'm not surprised he threw it into the crowd and kept his sunnies on for the whole podium.

Hamilton asked Bolt to show him how to raise his hands in the air, then he got some shiny football boots.  I've deleted any further coverage.

US GP - Results

1. No Vices Now - 1,063*
2. Moneyball - 1,032*
3. Two World Champions, two future World Champions and, um, two other guys - 1,008*
4. Hoping for an Indian Summer - 944*
5. The Pitstop Princess - 938*
6. Evel Marque - 937*
7. Bernie is a hobbit - 920*
8. Jenson's Whinging Legacy - 888*
9. Even more hopeful - 871*
10. Burn After Racing - 785*
11. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 748*
12. BOT-RAI-PER - 624*
13. Slightly Slower Racing - 579
14. Hippy F1 - 568*

* Home track played

Japan GP - "Lovely managed race"

Well, lap 1 was quite exciting.  Ocon got to third!  Raikkonen lost places...hopefully to produce some exciting racing later on....Sainz went rallying (for his last Toro Rosso race).  We learnt twenty year olds have no fear.  And Vettel had spark plug problems...ending the hopes for any exciting racing later.

On lap 11, Ricciardo produced a great overtake.  Horner coached him: "brave it out...good boy".  That was the radio catchphrase, all the engineers were praising their "good boys" or prize whippets.

It wasn't long after that that Bottas and Hamilton swapped places.  Where do you stand?  And does it matter anymore?  Perez and Ocon geared up for a fight but were held back too.

Stroll "brought out" the third Virtual Safety Car on lap 47.  Did they do much to spice up the race?

There was some worry on lap 51 of 53 when Hamilton complained about vibrations.  I'm not sure why the team didn't message back telling him to suck it up.

At the very end, Alonso ignored blue flags to hold up Verstappen's change against Hamilton.  Now he's 59 points clear with four races left to go.  I'm really looking forward to all the "if Hamilton finishes...and if Vettel finishes..."

Finally, I think Mo Farah might have been at the race.

Japan GP - Results

1. No Vices Now - 999*
2. Moneyball - 985*
3. Two World Champions, two future World Champions and, um, two other guys - 959*
4. Torque of the Devil - 903*
5. Hoping for an Indian Summer - 893*
6. Evil Marque - 887*
7. Bernie is a hobbit - 862*
8. Jenson's Whinging Legacy - 854*
9. The Pitstop Princess - 838
10. Even more hopeful - 837*
11. Burn After Racing - 761*
12. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 703*
13. BOT-RAI-PER - 592*
14. Hippy F1 - 545*
15. Slightly Slower Racing - 518

*Home track played

Malaysia GP - Results

1. No Vices Now - 931*
2. Moneyball - 915*
3. Two World Champions, two future World Champions and, um, two other guys - 910*
4. Torque of the Devil - 846*
5. Hoping for an Indian Summer - 836*
6. Evel Marque - 834*
7. Bernie is a hobbit - 815*
8. The Pitstop Princess - 785
9. Jenson's Whinging Legacy - 780*
10. Even more hopeful - 763*
11. Burn After Racing - 699*
12. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 666*
13. BOT-RAI-PER - 549*
14. Hippy F1 - 511*
15. Slightly Slower Racing - 476

*Home track played

I SHALL BE CHASING SUBS THIS WEEK!!!

Malaysia GP - "Great start to a new decade (for you)"

It wasn't a bad race.  The start looked unpromising with Vettel at the back of the grid and Raikkonen wheeled off with a poorly motor but Verstappen overtook Hamilton on Lap 4 and it was Game On.  Gasly did a good job replacing Kvyat and there was lots of overtaking up and down the field.  Team radio keeps on giving.  Hulkenberg was told: "stopping is not an option".  That's F1 101.  Press the Red Button for Vettel's own race commentary: "Come on Alonso, I thought you were better than that."  Ricciardo was advised: "You've broken Vettel's spirit...he's run out of tyres".  Spirit and tyres being intrinsically linked.

Something went awry between Vettel and Stroll on the cool down lap, perhaps Vettel had received the surprising news that he is Driver of the Day?  He got a lift back from Wehrlein; the only way Wehrlein is going to get any TV coverage.

The podium was unsightly too.  Hamilton took his shoes off (?!) and Webber was allowed up without a suit jacket on (this is what we base podium interviewer guesses on.)

I'm not sure if this was picked up by the TV production teams but it was Verstappen's 20th birthday (which makes me feel very old) and it might have been the last race in Malaysia?

Singapore GP - Results

1. No Vices Now - 876*
2. Two World Champions, two future World Champions and, um, two other guys - 846*
3. Evel Marque - 802*
4. Torque of the Devil - 801*
5. Hoping for an Indian Summer - 791*
6. Bernie is a hobbit - 787*
7. Moneyball - 771
8. The Pitstop Princess - 753
9. Jenson's Whinging Legacy - 717*
10. Even more hopeful - 700*
11. Burn After Racing - 635*
12. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 584*
13. BOT-RAI-PER - 539*
14. Hippy F1 - 487*
15. Slightly Slower Racing - 442

*Home track played

Singapore GP - "Thank you for believing in me"

Lots of news in the build up to this race.  Renault going to McLaren.  Honda going to Toro Rosso (what Japanese for Red Bull?).  Aston Martin coming to Red Bull.  It would set things up nicely for next year if Mercedes and Ferrari swap engines too.  Really it seems everyone is handing the competition to them.

Then it started to rain and things looked very promising.

Then, Vettel ruined the race on Lap 1.

Then, the Great Spanish Hope, Alonso bowed out on Lap 9.

Then, the Great Dutch Hope bowed out.  Boo to mega-crashes.

I started to keep a Safety Car tally, which stopped at three but even these weren't enough to rescue the enjoyment in the race.

We were amused by the complete lack of reaction in the garage to Kvyat's crash: clearly what they expect of him.

A tricky race meant some terse radio.  Responding to Haas asking Magnussen to "push the button": "shut up".  Then Toro Rosso asked Sainz to"reserve the engine": "shut up please".  Although if we are going to bring our children up as the F1 spectators of the future, the Americans are going to have to get smarter at bleeping out the swearies.

With laps to go, Ricciardo was right on Hamilton's tail, you wouldn't have known this from the commentary though...I wonder what it would have been if the positions were reversed?

At the end, there were only 12 finishers and Massa still couldn't get in the points...  Even Palmer was sixth.

1. Two World Champions, two future World Champions and, um, two other guys - 799*
2. No Vices Now - 795*
3. Evel Marque - 741*
4. Torque of the Devil - 740*
5. Bernie is a hobbit - 735*
6. Hoping for an Indian Summer - 730*
7. The Pitstop Princess - 692
8. Moneyball - 686
9. Even more hopeful - 637*
10. Jenson's Whinging Legacy - 591
11. Burn After Racing - 588*
12. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 551*
13. BOT-RAI-PER - 510*
14. Hippy F1 - 446*
15. Slightly Slower Racing - 419

* Home track played

Italy GP - "Pidgeon Italian from the 3rd Placed Driver (and probably a "Nice Job Lewis" or "Get it there" that wasn't broadcast)"

London has many things the rest of us don't get access to, but it seems the SkyF1 channel isn't one of them so I've been asked to guest blog while PSP and her litter were holidaying in the big city.

Sky's coverage took a break from the usual Hamilton-heavy features to carry out the obligatory "We're in Italy so lets jam as many Ferrari pieces in as we can" schedule (everyone in Italy passionately loves Ferrari and thinks about red cars 24/7, don't you know?). It did include one of the best Kimi interviews I've ever seen, as he was surprisingly pleasant and chatty with Brundle... Probably was for the best to steer clear of Hamilton anyway, in case he carried out a rendition of his Princess Di poem.

It's worth mentioning the farce that was qually: Grosjean's crash, due to weather he warned was unsafe to drive in, red-flagged the session, which then didn't restart for nearly 3 hours because of said weather. A litany of farcical grid penalties (9 drivers penalised for offenses such as replacing faulty parts and forgetting to collect Tiger Tokens when fueling up) meant the grid looked nothing like it did at the end of qually and only someone with the brains of an actuary could work it all out.....All this lead to the inevitable Hamilton pole, Vettel starting way back, Lance Stroll on the front row and bad omens for a predictable outcome.

Lance Stroll decided not to go for the win (leaving Hamilton free to fly off onto an insurmountable lead). Meanwhile Max Verstappen decided to ruin his race after only 4 laps by smacking into Massa.... Bloody foolish weans, don't know what they've got till it's gone.

Sauber decided to try and hit each other in an attempt to get on TV (though I'd forgotten what they looked like and had to Google them). They were not shown again and you have to wonder how much worse they would be if the Honda deal had went through (NOTE: PSP and I both drive Hondas and are very happy with them [not a plug to get more Hondas - ed.] [unless they're up for that? - ed.]).

Joylen Palmer did his best to prevent McLaren getting their hands on his Renault engine, diving off the track and peeving Fernando in the process - "5 seconds is a joke", repeatedly bleated Alonso, who presumably felt castration was a more suitable punishment for the minor offence. I suspect the thought of McLaren throwing away Honda money for a small engine improvement has finally brought on his mental breakdown.

Danny Ric shimmied his way up the field, as he always seems to do, despite his car feeling "gooey in traffic". An incredible drive by him again, it's a shame he joined Red Bull as their era ended.

The Ferraris, having ballsed up qualification, decided to use team orders early on to enable Kimi to battle the increasingly impressive Force Indias for 5/6th (instead of the Mercs) and allowing Vettel another bland 3rd.

Williams tried to liven things up for the viewers, with their drivers attempting to take each other out on the last lap. Mercifully it didn't come off for them. 

Oh, and as expected Hamilton bolted off to an unassailable lead and will now win the championship, become the greatest driver of all time and be canonised by the end of the week. Despite all this, the fans at Monza booed him...though they may have just been booing the garish Heineken themed trophy he was given.

Belgian GP - Results

1. Two World Champions, two future World Champions and, um, two other guys - 753*
2. No Vices Now - 729*
3= Bernie is a hobbit - 682*
3= Evel Marque - 682*
5. Hoping for an Indian Summer - 675*
6. The Pitstop Princess - 633
7. Torque of the Devil - 630
8. Moneyball - 624
9. Even more hopeful - 590*
10. Jenson's Whinging Legacy - 544
11. Burn After Racing - 523*
12. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 495
13. BOT-RAI-PER - 482*
14. Hippy F1 - 416*
15. Slightly Slower Racing - 398

*Home track played

Belgium GP - "..."

No winning radio transmission from Hamilton and not much to say from me.  When did Belgium become disappointing?

This year the track really suffered from "Curse of the Home Race" with honorary Belgian Verstappen going out on Lap 8 and genuine Belgian Van Doorne starting right at the back of the grid.  How can a land that gave the world chips with mayonnaise be so cruel?

It turned it's attention to Raikkonen on Lap 16 with a ten second penalty, depriving us poor spectators of yet more action: "What do you mean?  It was at the side of the road!"  Alonso decided that we should no longer enjoy his team radio: "No more radio for the rest of the race."

Force India drivers did their best to spice up the race, with Race Control "noting" their childish spats.  Vettel's attempt to give the race a little drama by having a slow second pit stop, did nothing but hand the race to Hamilton.  My drive of the day goes to Ricciardo, who at least overtook Bottas and Raikkonen.

The analysis of the race has given me more to comment on than the race.  Webber believed it to have been: "an absolutely amazing display from the top three drivers".  What?  Of driving unchallenged?  Hamilton answered his first podium question with the usual: "The crowd have been amazing."  Followed by some controversial (?) "Irish orange" stuff.  His second question was answered with something about: "Dreams do come true."  And to think that some people might want to hear about his racing?  Ricciardo got the biggest cheers, which is well justified.  Bottas got a review from his boss of: "performance not good."  Well, he's been resigned for next year, so he's probably resting on his laurels now.

Raikkonen has also been resigned for next season.  Which cements for me that he has some sort of incriminating information about someone high up in Ferrari.

Hungary GP - Results

1. Two World Champions, two future World Champions and, um, two other guys - 708*
2. No Vices Now - 685*
3. Bernie is a Hobbit - 634*
4. Evel Marque - 629*
5= Hoping for an Indian Summer - 585
5= Torque of the Devil - 585
7. The Pitstop Princess - 580
8. Moneyball - 574
9. Even more hopeful - 563*
10. Jenson's Whinging Legacy - 517
11. BOT-RAI-PER - 453*
12. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 447
13. Burn After Racing - 443
14. Hippy F1 - 401*
15. Slightly Slower Racing - 383

*Home track played

British GP - "Lovely job"

It's July, it's the British Grand Prix, it's time to find the keys to the crypt and drag out Murray Walker.  Talking of "blast from the past": Louise Goodman!

Qualifying for this race was just as interesting as the race really.  Red Bull's problem with reliability continues to dog them; they can't even get both cars through Q1 (it says a lot when Horner predicts Vettel or Hamilton to win).  The huge cheer from the crowd as Alonso made pole in Q1 was brilliant too.

There was much excitement as Cars 3 was trailed in the paddock, although it had petered out by the time Owen Wilson took to the podium.

There were other disappointments.  Bedward said: "You have to feel for Palmer.  He doesn't have all the upgrades Hulkenberg has." or the skills.  Both Toro Rosso cars went out on lap 2.  I'm sure this would have been big news if they were further up the pit lane and excited montages about "The Rivalry" compiled but who gets worked up about Kvyat these days?

One of the enjoyable parts of the race isn't what you saw but what you heard.  The crowd cheering is great and there was some good radio too.  From Bottas': "minimal talking" to Grosjean's "so stupid, unbelievable" at his own mistake.

It got more confusing towards the end.  Raikkonen's tyre shredding three laps from the end avoided any awkwardness when he would have been asked to move over for Vettel.  Then Vettel punctured his tyre, just as he passed the pit lane entrance.  Still, it's tight at the top and I think we're set for some more close racing this season...