Spain GP Race Report

Following Qualifying, Norris must have taken a knock on his confidence gained at Monaco last weekend.  His team mate Piastri secured pole with the largest margain of the season.  Would he be aggressive in this race?  He needed to be.

Stroll decided that the recurring pain in his wrist (from a pre-season training accident quite a while ago) required him to travel somewhere else to have a "procedure".  Strange that he couldn't have waited twenty-four hours.  And let Drugovich have a drive, a long-waited for F1 start.

Colapinto was penalised for his break-down in the pit lane during Qualifying and would start last on the grid, with Tsunoda starting from the pit lane, having qualified there anyway and changing his suspension.

Much had been made of the race down to turn one but Piastri made an amazing start and held his position.  Other drivers were three abreast and there was some argy-bargy at the back.  Somehow Albon lost three places and sustained damage to his front wing, Alonso lost his points-finishing place and Sainz remained in 17th.  Verstappen got past Norris and both Ferraris got past Russell.

Lots of drivers tried an early stop strategy (by lap 10) including Albon (forced to get a new front wing), Sainz, Tsunoda, Bearman and Hulkenberg.  Norris got past Verstappen and he didn't do much to defend it, coming in immediately after for his new tyres.  Alonso had a big old trip over the gravel, perhaps getting some practice in for the next series he will drive.

A third of the way through the race, Piastri had pulled out five seconds ahead of his team mate and it was looking critical between Norris, who had not taken a pit stop, and Verstappen, who had.  The Red Bull undercut both McLarens for the lead.

Albon was the first retirement, shunted, bumped, damaged and demoralised.

Having so many stops in the race, some were bound to be duds.  Ferrari did a slow one for Hamilton.

With eleven laps to go, Antonelli ended up in the gravel, which he needed to stop the car as the engine failed and there was a Safety Car.   Taking a pit stop seemed a good idea.  The McLarens were double stacked and both came out in front of Verstappen's Red Bull.  Behind them LeClerc, Russell and Hamilton also came in.  Verstappen put on the hard tyre because it was the only option and it wasn't ideal.  This didn't put him in a positive mindset.

There were only six laps to go when the Safety Car was due to end and Piastri slammed his brakes on to control the pack.  It looked like Verstappen might take Norris but LeClerc overtook him instead, even Russell looked like he might have a chance to pass him.  Max would be a grumpy goose after the race.  In fact, he lost his rear end and had a little tap, each blaming the other.  Verstappen was asked to let Russell through and thought he had permission but Versappen cut him off with a bump.  Rosberg thought he should get a black flag.  

With one lap to go, Hulkenberg overtook Hamilton for 6th place, the Sauber driver having a great race and we heard the cheer from the fans as Alonso overtook Lawson for a one point finish.  It finished with a McLaren one-two with the Ferrari of LeClerc behind.

In the end, Verstappen was given a ten second penalty, which dropped him down to 10th place.  He said it was a "misjudgement" but was very critical of Russell's response and said he would bring him tissues for the next time.

I'm sure Piastri celebrated with a small sangria (hold the red wine and brandy).  LeClerc was surprised and somewhat bewildered to find himself being interviewed.

Will Stroll return for his home race in Canada?  Can Piastri extend his championship lead there?  Let's hope Williams find their pace again as we cross the Atlantic.

Spain GP Qualifying Report

Going into Qualifying in Barcelona, Piastri had won Free Practice.  After the first round of quick laps in the first session, he was the quickest, ahead of Verstappen and Norris.  Then the drivers queued up in the pit lane for the shoot out at the end.  Colapinto had a problem at the front and couldn't get going; finally Sainz decided to undertake him, which was permitted and it took the other drivers behind them a while to get round and going.  Sainz was knocked out by Ocon in the Haas in the last few seconds, he in turn was knocked out by his rookie team mate who went through in 11th.  Piastri remained quickest.  His old team mate Hulkenberg was also knocked out by his rookie team mate Bortoleto.   So it was Hulkenberg, Ocon, Sainz, Colapinto and Tsunoda out.  For the Red Bull to be last in Qualifying will raise huge questions.

The track did not seem to be improving as the second session progressed.  Williams did not seem to have the same speed as they showed as the last couple of races.  Out went Albon, Bortoleto, Lawson, Stroll and Bearman.  Hadjar put in another great lap for 6th.  Piastri was fastest, with Norris ahead of Verstappen this time.

It looked briefly like Norris might take pole position.  He set the fastest time after the first round of laps, stealing a tow from his team mate.  Positions were reversed for the final laps and Norris pushed hard, perhaps too hard and behind him Piastri put in purple sectors every time he crossed the timing lines.  It finished Piastri, Norris, Verstappen, Russell, Hamilton, Antonelli, LeClerc, Gasly, Hadjar and Alonso.  The Spaniard was very pleased with his lap and whooped as he came in, waving to the crowd.

The most annoying thing about this part of the event?  The contact talk of the "TD" or Technical Directive - I don't think this needs an abb.

Spain GP Race Report

No news had broke over night since Qualifying.  Verstappen had said that he didn't think the Red Bull was the quickest car on the grid any more; Perez' performance would testify to that.  Albon changed a power unit and would start from the pit lane.  Sargeant had received a penalty but it made no difference to his last place starting position.

Norris made a good start but Verstappen matched him, however Russell took the tow and went round both of them to take first place, with the Dutchman taking the McLaren too.  By Lap 3 though, Russell moved to try and break the tow he was giving Verstappen but it was to no avail and he took the place.

Whilst other teams struggled to provide their drivers with clean stops, Red Bull serviced Max in 1.9 seconds.  With Norris leading when other pitted, he stayed out and lost out, coming back out in 5th.

It was a two stop race and Norris lost out again to a pit stop that lasted over three seconds, bringing him out behind Verstappen but in front of the Mercedes.

Ultimately Verstappen took the win with Norris and Hamilton behind him (I did not see him get past Russell for his first podium of the season).

It was a race full of overtakes and not as dull as people suspected it might be.  Only one more Barcelona to go before the Spanish GP moves to Madrid.

Spain GP Qualifying Report

We went into Qualifying with three separate incidents in Free Practice where drivers came together.  The battles seemed already to have been set up.

The Racing Bulls and Williams both had poor sessions, out line astern in the first stint along with Magnussen.  Sargeant impeded another car but as he sits at the back of the grid, the stewards have nowhere to go with their penalty choices.

The second session was equally based team-by-team. with the Aston Martins out in 11th and 14th, the Saubers out in 12th and 15th along with Hulkenberg,

The third and final session answered some questions that were asked at the beginning of the season.  It looked like Verstappen was going to take an easy pole.  First Sainz, then LeClerc in the Ferraris took the place next to him.  Secondly, Russell then Hamilton held the spot.  Finally, Norris took pole from Verstappen.  People who asked why Norris signed a longer contract with McLaren, here's your answer.  For those who asked how Alpine had got it so wrong, here is the answer, 7th for Gasly and 9th for Ocon.  For those asking why Red Bull resigned Perez, we still don't have an answer as he qualified 8th.  In 10th was Piastri who made a big mistake on his final hot lap and went through the gravel.  

Commentators thought it was a thrilling qualifying, possibly the last minute was but at this standard, benchmark track, the teams qualified in standard benchmark order.

Spain GP Race Report

Once again, race was forecast, which, combined with a slightly topsy-turvy grid could have made for an interesting race.  Having caused a collision with his team mate during Qualifying and receiving a "formal warning", Russell went off over the gravel on the way to the grid pre-race.

LeClerc and Sargeant decided to start in the pit lane.  Everyone made an aggressive start but Verstappen held first with Norris and Hamilton coming together behind him, Norris needing to pit for a new nose.  Alonso made up 3 places in the first 2 laps.  The Mercedes engines were doing well with Piastri, Russell and Hamilton making up some places.

The first pit stop window opened and Sainz and Ferrari seemed to be arguing over whether it was a good time or not.  When Verstappen took his pit stop, he was 30 seconds ahead of his team mate Perez and safely back out in the lead.

Then, halfway through the race, Russell reported rain at turn 5 and Christian Horner tried holding his hand out.  It wasn't rain, it was his own sweat.

Verstappen had a good lead but was given a black and white flag for going over the track limits.  What ensued was some discussion between the driver and the team about whether he needed to keep pushing.  Then the race ended without my really noticing.  The Mercedes upgrades are working well, claiming the other two places on the podium.  Sainz wasn't able to keep Perez behind him.  The Aston Martins were 6th and 7th with the Spaniard behind.  Home tracks are not favourable this year.

Despite a lot of overtaking, it wasn't a gripping race.  Having experienced a year of Red Flags and Safety Cars, are we entering a more stable era?

Spain GP Qualifying Report

Another race weekend, another threat of rain.  Not the Monagasque showers, not the Emilia Romagna floods but lightning in Barcelona.  Verstappen was uncomfortable in Free Practice in these conditions; was he too unsettled to qualify well?  Of course not.

It was spitting as the cars went out for the first Qualifying session and weatherman Russell felt rain was on the way.  Ferrari were sitting in the pits, risking losing a dry lap.  Tsunoda was the first to take a trip across the gravel.  Then the Ferraris were out.  Perhaps they were listening to the Mercedes team radio?  6 laps later Bottas took a jaunt through the gravel and the Red Flag was brought out.  Alonso also went through his native gravel and De Vries too.  Then Albon.  Did the stewards want everyone out on wet weather tires?  No, they wanted to sweep up the gravel.  From then on, rain wasn't mentioned again.

It still got very desperate in the Ferrari garage.  LeClerc was in the bottom 5 until the last minute, having to take a new set of soft tires to get through and, home track hero, Sainz was called to the weigh bridge.  As the chequered flag approached the track got quicker, with Albon setting a quick lap in his Williams and Norris leading the board briefly.  Zhou did much better than his team mate Bottas, who was out.  LeClerc was also out, continuing his abysmal year.  Albon fell down the placings and out, with his team mate, Sargeant last.  Magnussen completed the set.

Verstappen radioed in about being impeded by Gasly; Alonso also radioed in about this.

In the second session, Russell told his team how much he was struggling with the car.  It was so bad that Sky had bleep out the b****y before his Nora.  Perez let Red Bull know he was struggling with his car by taking himself out of qualifying and into the gravel.  They were out of Qualifying with both Alpha Tauris and Zhou.  The Mercedes also had a coming together, so Russell may have scuppered Hamilton's session too.

It was a mixed bag of competitors in the final session.  Again the track got quicker and quicker as the session went on.  Alonso could only hit 4th before everyone jumping ahead of him, finishing 9th.  Verstappen took pole, of course, with Spaniard Sainz next to him.  The Spanish will have to remember to cheer him as well as Fernando.  McLaren have finally found some pace, finishing 3rd and 10th (rookie Piastri not showing as well has his more experienced team mate Norris).  Norris is buddies with Verstappen and they seemed pleased to be on the pole "podium" together.  Stroll was 6th and ahead of his team mate.  When the Sky interviewer hinted at a podium, he showed a darker side, commenting: "Now you're teasing me..."    

Gasly finished Saturday with a 6 place grid penalty - 3 for impeding Verstappen and 3 for impeding Sainz.  He's basically a bollard.

Can Sainz and Norris do anything to hold onto Verstappen tomorrow?  Can Perez or LeClerc come through the field.  Will Norris end up still inside the top 10?  Can Alonso continue his run of podiums?

Spain GP Race Report

Another week, another scorching hot race.  I remember when Spain wasn't at all interested in F1 but now it's a huge event.  They have two drivers participating with massive support, with that in mind, Alonso took a new engine and had to start at the back of the grid.  Most teams turn up the wick at their home track.

It was predicted as a two or three stop race with tire degradation being a major issue and the drivers who can best manage their tires being in the best situation.

An exciting start off the grid; Perez got an excellent take-off and was briefly third before being overtaken by Russell.  Behind them, Hamilton also made a good start but was then tagged by Magnussen, who went off into the gravel.  Magnussen made it back to the pits and eventually came back out.  Hamilton had a puncture and pitted to get new tires.  Just when a red flag or safety car would have helped them out immensely, none was forthcoming.  I believe it's a different rotation of race director this weekend...

Alonso was being heartily cheered on as he progressed up the grid.  By the time he reached 14th, Sainz was caught by a gust of wind at turn 4 and spun off, luckily he was able to get back on the track.  A couple of laps later, Verstappen was caught out by the same (???) gust of wind at turn 4, spinning off the track and coming back on.  During this incident though, Russell and Perez went passed him.  Red Bull had to solve the headache of whether to leave Perez ahead or ask him to move over.  It didn't take long before the latter was acted out.

Hamilton was on the radio asking to retire the car and save the engine.  He was told to keep going as he might get 8th place.  How the mighty have fallen.  Still he rises.  Talking of ignominy, Ricciardo was overtaken by Norris.

Red Bull faced their own mechanical problems, with the DRS flap not always opening.  A long and angry team radio conversation ensued, with Verstappen being told he had closed the DRS flap at one point and the reply being that he has to press it 50 times to get it to work.  During this Verstappen is in a long and intense battle with Russell for second place.  Verstappen briefly took the lead but Russell regained his position immediately.  Perez arrived at the back of this tussle and got on his radio demanding to be let past Verstappen as he had fresher tires.  Meanwhile, LeClerc is miles out ahead and enjoying a calm race before we see him going slowly and hear a noise akin to a Dyson switching off and a space being cleared in the garage for his car.  The first retirement.  Heartbreaking.

Stroll helped Hamilton gain a place closer to his race-leading team mate by spinning off.  It felt like he might just trundle about at the back to prove his point to his team.  Then he shook off his fug and made his way up to 4th position.

Red Bull pitted Verstappen, solving the dilemma of which of their drivers should be in front of the other.  This also put Bottas in a podium position.  Half way through the race, Perez sailed passed Russell to take the lead.  Verstappen was able to overtake Bottas for third place easily.  Another Ferrari powered engine, that of Zho, then failed.  The reliability gremlins have left the sinking ship of Red Bull for the sweeter pastures at Ferrari.

Red Bull positions were again changed two thirds through the race when Verstappen took a third pitstop.  He later thanked Perez on the radio for being a "good team mate".  Read "biddable".  The Mexican did take the point for fastest lap though and commented on the radio that: "We need to speak later."

With one lap to go both Mercedes were told to "lift and coast" as much as possible and this was a DNF risk.  Sainz was straight passed.  Bizarrely it was water leak on the power unit.  Unusual and even more unusual that it occurred on both cars.

The Spanish GP was notable in that there were no red flags and no safety cars.  Lots of overtaking, DRS and otherwise.  Lots of action albeit with stretches of order maintained.  Russell was overjoyed to be on the podium.  Verstappen looked happy  but used to these circumstances.  Perez looked fed up  but pulled out a smile for the Spanish crowd and diplomatic comments.  It didn't help that De La Rosa also called his a "great team player."

Spain GP Qualifying Report

Back to racing in Europe and major upgrades were expected.  Aston Martin reworking themselves as the Green Bull did no good as both drivers were out in Q1.  Along with Alonso, massively disappointing the record Spanish crowd.  Upon being told he was out, Vettel said: "You must be kidding".  So it must have all looked very promising on paper.

Greater drama came in Q2 at the end.  Norris had his time eliminated just as the session was ending, which meant that both Haas were through to Q3.  Alpha Tauri felt that they could not give Gasly the car he deserved, he did manage to get this horrific vehicle to 14th though.

At a circuit where overtaking is difficult, it would be a test for the new aerodynamic regulations to see if they could spice up the race but, just in case, the drivers needed to qualify well.  LeClerc hadn't had a brilliant session so far, spinning the car.  When it looked like Verstappen might get the pole, he radioed that he was losing power, was told to go to the pits by his team and didn't.  Luckily for him, his first run lap was good enough for second; with home hero Sainz only managing third and his team mate LeClerc getting the pole.  The commentators were looking to see if Russell could get in the mix with this potential change of order, not Hamilton though...  Russell managed fourth.  LeClerc didn't seem to believe it in the interviews.

Spain GP Race Report

Max Vestappen has been racing for 5 years now.  Where has the time gone?  He was celebrating 100 races with Red Bull.  A race weekend of hundreds.  And ten hundred in the stands for race day.  Unlike other tracks, most of whom have tried to disguise the stands, Spain felt empty and desolate during qualifying and not much better on race day.  Having a few fans in, you wonder what the atmosphere was like.

With Hamilton starting on pole, the race, as always, was his to lose.  However, no one has won from pole this year.  It was a clean first corner, with Hamilton making a poor start (by a gnat's scrotum) and Verstappen able to get past at the end of the straight. And then headed out by himself.

It was mooted before the race that the teams in the pits could make all the difference in a race.  With a snail-paced 4.2 hour, sorry second, pit stop for Verstappen, could this give the race to Hamilton?  It made no difference.  

Hamilton took a second stop which Verstappen did not, so then it was a waiting game to see whether he was able to overtake Bottas (arf arf) and then overtake Verstappen.  I very much enjoyed all the radio to Bottas: "we are following Lewis", "Lewis is on a different strategy from you", "Lewis is fighting for the win" and finally "Don't hold Lewis up".  In the end, Bottas did not make it easy for him.  A dirty protest there.  The pass for the lead was clean and confident.  With his win, Hamilton equals Senna's record making five consecutive wins on the same track.  It makes me wonder whether Hamilton has some team of archivists squirrelled away somewhere finding records for him to break.  None of this taking into account how many more races there are a season each year.

Verstappen was magnanimous at the end, he "could see it coming" and was a "sitting duck", speaking of working hard to catch up and pleased with the jump forward the team has made.  Button asked Bottas to try and find some positives from the race, he blamed LeClerc for holding him up at the start of the race.  Hamilton could have blamed Verstappen for the same thing.

A new feature for this race was hearing the radio between the teams and race control, namely between Wolff at Mercedes asking for blue flags to signal to Mazepin to let the leader, Hamilton, past.  This has huge potential for more interesting races.

There were lots of tasty overtakes during the race, Sainz on Norris for example, so it's not all doom and gloom and moaning about a boring procession.  If any of the top three had won the race it would have been well earned.  The only question is whether and why Perez is not up there, I guess he can take the Ricciardo defense that he has only just joined the team.   We know Red Bull have no patience with second drivers, he may only retain the seat for a lack of obvious substitutes.

Finally, Williams are very susceptible to wind issues.  Baked beans have been banned in their pit.  Russell finished a creditable 14th however.  Happy days.

Spain GP Qualifying Report

The paddock gossip this week has been whether Bottas will be replaced mid-season if he doesn't start performing.  Mercedes and their team principal, Wolff, issued an unequivocal statement that he has a year long contract to race with them.  I wonder if this includes becoming the reserve driver.  Like most politicians, if they clearly state there will be no change to current policy, a think tank is currently working on it for them.  I have also noticed that there has been more coverage of Russell in his Williams, following him around on a lap, in the pits.  Hmmm.  (Crofty also called him Bottarse during his commentary).  Also Mick Schumacher continues to receive more media coverage than any backmarker rookie ever.

Other drivers facing the pressure include Ricciardo, there has been intense scrutiny of his Q1 exit last weekend even though he made some places up in the race.  Button identified him as the big One to Watch this week on his Instagram Stories, even though he has spent 7 days going over his qualifying pace with the media acknowledging and explaining his failures.  Ultimately you have do your talking on the track and he did outqualify his teammate here.

Raikkonen being fastest of anyone in sector 1 for a significant part of Q1, was still part of the no surprises eliminated drivers: Tsunoda, Raikkonen, Schumacher, Latifi and Mazepin.

No surprises in Q2 either: Stroll, Gasly, Vettel, Giovinazzi and Russell out.

Surprises in Q3?  Perez spun mid-session bringing out yellow flags, obliging cars to slow down as they pass the scene of the crime.  This had an impact on a couple of drivers out on quick laps.  With two and half minutes to go, every car left their garage at the same time to put in what would hopefully be their very quickest lap.  In the end not many bested their first lap and predictably the top three are Hamilton, Verstappen and Bottas.  I could have written this report before the session started.  The grid means that Hamilton has reached 100 pole positions, which is only important really in that it gives the media something to fill the time/columns with as they aren't able to discuss such a boring qualifying.  Please do leave a comment and tell me which is your favourite Hamilton pole lap (he names Singapore 2018).

Spain GP - "Awesome day in the seat there"

I thought my maths had left me down,  as I thought 0.6 second was quite a hefty gap on the grid from Bottas to Hamilton but no one mentioned it for ages.  Well done Bottas.
Ricciardo also took a penalty going to the grid, for something "naughty" apparently, but I don't know what.  I think the commentators were having a siesta this race.
The race was fairly predictable. Hamilton led from start to finish. Ferrari made The Switch. Norris sprayed gravel about the track like an Angus near gravel.  Typically Hamilton got all the safety car luck and Bottas got none.  And Toro Rosso really lost out through the safety car, who stacked in the pit lane and then ballsed up the stop. For the first time in a long time, the much-lauded safety car actually created some drama.  Hamilton is also very good at a restart. 

Shame about the empty grandstands.

Spain GP - Results

1. Evel Marque - 281*
2. BottHaas - 276
3. The Hope Fulls - 272
4. Je suis Charlie - 235
5. PickedInAHurry - 234
6. The Pitstop Princess - 167
7. Jack the Lad - 164
8. Hippy F1 - 163
9. Ferrari Rocher - 147
10. Francesco Bernoulli - 127*

* Home track played

Spain GP - Results

Notable that we have joint leaders with teams that do not share a single common selection:

1= Give it some Gasly! 249

1= Halo, baby! 249*

3. Beauty & the F1 Geek 224

4. Two World Champions, Two Future World Champions, and um, Two Other Guys 222

5= Evel Marque 206

5= Maximum attack! 206

7. The Pitstop Princess 202

8. Hasstag#FaceBull 195

9. No Vices Now 194

10. Spa Day with a Shooey 184

11. The Hopefulls 177

12. Hippy F1 138

13. Jack Johnson 130

14 Wheels on Fire 89

#SpainishGP fail for Grosjean

Some bright spark tried to liven up proceedings by painting #SpainishGP up and down the pit-lane.  Spainish painters aside, what you can rely on at the Catalunya circuit is:

1. Qualifying is ark-like - the cars come in two by two by two.

2. The race is almost always won from the front row.

The ark went Mercedes-Ferrari-Red Bull and we seemed assured of Mercedes on the top step, and they duly obliged by filling the top two steps, and staying in order.  The surprise was that Verstappen leap-frogged both Ferraris (Kimi's car gave up and Vettel needed an extra stop) to take the final spot.  Post-race, Hamilton had to remind Max to get weighed.  "Yeah, it's been a while", laughed Max.

The main talking point of the race was Grosjean somewhat inexplicably burying the throttle as he span, mid-pack, on the first lap.  His improvised smokescreen meant he wiped out Hulkenberg and Gasly and deprived us of some potentially good racing (and condemned himself to "null points" until Canada at least, because surely he can't make it through Monaco without incident?  Prove me wrong, Romain.).  Is this a return to the accident-prone 2014 Grosjean?  He's really letting down those who picked Haas.  At least he didn't try to blame Erikson this time.  He said he "tried to save the car and put it in a good direction".  From behind guilty sunglasses.  Then off to the stewards to get his deserved points (licence, not championship) and grid demotion for Monaco.  Gunter Steiner tried to stick up for him, saying the penalty was "like kicking him in the face".  Best not give Gasly and Hulk ideas, Gunter.

Other notable moments were: Alonso round the outside of Ocon at turn 3, Sirotkin and Ricciardo not being able to drive at VSC speeds, Max clipping the back of Stroll, and Perez smashing through Max's discarded front-wing end-plate.

Hartley tyre-walled his car in final practice and it actually snapped while being picked up by the recovery vehicle.  No qualy for Brendon.  That enabled him to make up the most places, though largely due to attrition rather than awesome driving.  Cue me cruelly willing my also-ran drivers to fail FP3 and start from the back of the grid in future races.  Fastest lap was Ricciardo proving the pace of the Red Bull in race trim and/or no-one else grandstanding for the fastest lap.

Hamilton talked some b******s about having "synergy with the car" and no-one listened, because they were still thinking, "seriously dude, what is with your hair?".

Next: Monaco, baby!

twctfwcautog

Spain GP - Results

Now, I did write notes on the Spanish GP but they are incomprehensible at the time of typing.  The time of typing follows watching the actual race live as our son had been packed off to his grandparents as I was in labour.  Three weeks followed in which we were mainly in hospital with the New Son.  Now Son #2 is asleep and #1 is in nursery, so here is my window of opportunity and I can't for the life of me remember what happened in Barca.

1. Evel Marque - 298*
2. No Vices Now - 294
3. Bernie is a hobbit - 280
4= Torque of the Devil - 277
4= Hoping for an Indian Summer - 277
6. Two World Champions, two future World Champions and, um, two other guys - 274
7. The Pitstop Princess - 249
8. Moneyball - 233
9= Jenson's Whinging Legacy - 203
9= Slightly Slower Racing - 203
9= Even more hopeful - 203
12. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 199
13. BOT-RAI-PER - 187
14. Burn After Racing - 176
15. Hippy F1 - 166

*Home track played

Spain GP - "unbelievable"

Testing track

Verstappen/Kvyat switch around - promotion, demotion, sideways moves, Red Bull did well out of it and Kvyat stuck it home with a fastest lap.  Just to clarify, if you have either driver in your team you will still score whatever points they score etc.
Hamilton's start - whooping in the Crossword King household
Hamilon/Rosberg L1 "racing incident" - this was rewound several times.  If it wasn't for the Old Skool gravel traps, I guess it wouldn't have mattered so much.  After throwing his steering wheel to the ground, Hamilton kept it very professional in the press pit.  I assume that there will an announcement shortly that Hamilton and Wehrlein are to swap seats?
Double noggin knockers - what I assume Toto did in the Mercedes truck
Haas - yet again, bringing the racing to the race
Dilemmas - now, I don't want Red Bull or Vettel to do well but I do want Ferrari and Ricciardo to...who should I be rooting for?
18 year old winner - are we going to be ruing this day in 5 years, 10 years...?  Or is it too much too soon and he'll go the Macauly Culkin way?
Smiling and talking - Raikkonen!
Booing - Vettel must wonder what on earth he has to do to win over the public.

Testing times

Worst interview ever with Sir Frank - courtesy of Alain Prost
Continuation of the poor strategy by Williams - Massa out in the first qualifying session
Does Verstappen even know the song Sweet Dreams? - probably not DC
Too much excitement - as Ricciardo fails to pass Vettel on L59
Webber's unlucky Red Bull seat - inherited by Ricciardo
Channel 4 - cut the podium room chat
Placido Domingo - ?

Spain GP - Results

1. Weak End of Bernie - 308*
2. BogOffBernie - 298
3. Three teams, one dream - 279
4. The Pitstop Princess - 272
5. Merc-redible Hulk - 255
6. Claire has to type this sentence each time as my team name - 234
7. No Vices Now - 225
8. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 215
9. Halo, it's me - 212
10. British Racing Green - 190
11. Hippy F1 - 187
12. The Maranello Marvels - 178
13. Marian's Marvels - 169
14. The Hopefuls - 167
15. Put out to Pastor - 90
16. Indiana Walker and the Tyres of Doom - 88

*Home track

Spain GP - "Excellent race...well managed"

Woo hoo

Mad Max - painted on the side of the Lotus' - did it affect their driving
Thinking "aren't Red Bull doing well?" - and then realising they are Toro Rosso
Sainz wing cam - excellent shots of the start of the race
Carmen Jorda - no need to comment
5.3 second stop - for Hamilton!  Compares to Vettel's 2.2 seconds
Doing it on the track - Hamilton: "You will have to find another solution".  Money well spent.
Pit stops - Alonso's front jack man leaped, Grosjean want too far, Sainz's was just poor
McLaren have made progress - ???
Winning - yay for Rosberg

Boo

Vettel's lucky coins - tucked into his laces???
Opal Fruits and pencils - Sky's budget has plummeted
Return of Hammertime - but not enough
Toro Rossos - qualifying heroes to race zeroes
Lotus's bad gear - bad idea
Maldonado - did so much with so little and then had to retire, for once a shame
Last lap contact - Kvyat and Sainz, schoolboy error

Spain GP Results

1. DC's Tighty Whiteys - 511
2. HamBerg from McCedes drive through please - 510*
3. Teutonic Titans, Titanic Twits - 504*
4. Sharks have no bones :) - 418
5. The F1 Flumps - 381
6. Mike and the Mechanics - 364
7. Lots of Trouble Usually Serious - 354
8. Go Fast and Prosper - 317
9. Double Mercedes is Boring! - 309
10= Muppet Racing - 305
10= Baby on Board - 305
12. Hippy F1 - 261
13. Baby Pitstop's Change Crew - 230
14= The Pitstop Princess - 222
14= The Hopefuls - 222
16. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 218
17. I blame Clarkson - 216
18= No Vices Now - 210
18=The Very Good Value - 210
20. I Monza brink of Insanity - 208
21. Juan Angus Fangio C.I. - 176
22. 10CC - 155

*Home track
Nb. a clerical error was made and the official home track for Teutonic Titans, Titanic Twits is Spain not Bahrain.

Spanish GP - "Pretty close for comfort"

Not much to write about for this race.  It was a bit of a procession with a couple of exceptions, see below.

Si

Bottas' start - I wasn't sure whether his start just looked great against Grosjean and Ricciardo, who went nowhere but the many replays reassured me that it was excellent.
8th gear - who knew?
Vettel - finally worth watching in races.  Earned you points for fastest lap and most places made up from grid position.
Intra-team racing - as seen at Ferrari and Mercedes.  Without it the procession rolls on.

No

Danny O'Sullivan? - answers on a postcard
Pitlane radio - nowhere near as good as it used to be
Hamilton - what a whingebottom
Massa - put him in a decent car and still he loses places
Baby Pitstop - refusing to show any signs of leaving the garage