Las Vegas GP Race Report

It was all showbusiness and glitz in Vegas for the race.  Mickey and Minnie Mouse waved the drivers onto the truck for the parade, as each was announced American style.  The trophy was a neon rainbow cascade of colour and the Disney marching band accompanied the Star Spangled Banner.

This circuit is easy for overtaking, so nothing was guaranteed for any driver, wherever they qualified.  Norris pulled out an aggressive start and went straight into Verstappen's path and then off over a corner; he dropped to third behind Russell.  Luckily, Piastri had also lost places off the start, having collided with Lawson.  Bearman made up four places and is firmly in contention for rookie of the year, or at least was at that point in proceedings.  Bortoleto won't be, having tried to make up too many places off the grid and tagging Stroll, who spun into others. Gasly also lost seven places from a great starting position.  Hamilton on the hard tyre was in 12th by the second lap, having started at the back.  There were bits of Lawson's wing all over the track so Virtual Safety Car conditions were called for to clear the track.  It was hard to keep up with everything that happened.

Antonelli and Albon were both noted for starting infringements; it was a late call as the stewards were busy investigating things up and down the pack.  Suddenly, LeClerc came to life and started to overtake one car after another.  Russell was less happy as he was encountering problems with his steering.  Albon went into the back of Hamilton; the VSC edict came again to clear up the debris.  

There were very traditional mid-race stops (a few folk went early), Norris and Sainz (running in 4th) led the way.  Piastri got Sainz straight away.  Verstappen took a free stop and there would be little that could happen to stop him winning the race.

It was Lap 34 when Norris finally made a good move and got past Russell for second.  It was incredibly disappointing that Sainz had dropped back to 7th after the pit stops.  After his initial mistake, it was a good recovery race for Norris but it will always be "what could have been".  LeClerc's promise mid-race didn't amount to much.  Antonelli's drive really stood out and could help him overtake Bearman for Rookie of the Year.

There were three non-finishers: Albon, Bortoleto and Stroll, all of whom disappeared quite quietly and presumably went to try their luck elsewhere on the Strip.

Terry Cruz drove the pink Lego Cadillac around the track to chauffeur the drivers to the podium.  All in all it was a great show and, of all the races on the calendar, is the one that I'm most drawn to attending.  There was an epilogue to the show though hours later, when both McLaren cars were disqualified.  I'm slightly annoyed that such a teeny-weeny margin could hand Verstappen yet another championship, although I suppose he will really have to battle now and not just wait and see what happens.  Another ding-dong between Norris and Verstappen could be interesting.  I'm also pleased that it bumps Sainz right up in the points.

Hungary GP - "nice drive"

Martin Brundle falls ill; Paul Di Resta is promoted.  Felipe Massa falls ill; Paul Di Resta is promoted.  Paul Di Resta is promoted; Anthony Davidson is promoted.

Not the only promotions this race...McLaren locked out the fourth row in qualifying!

At the start of the race, Ricciardo radioed in: "someone hit me".  Yes, your team mate.  Crofty observed of the start: "Di Resta let everyone get away ahead of him."  How kind.  Soon after, Renault are on the radio to Hulkenberg: "Jo is slower than you".  He was very kind not to reply.  Why hadn't we heard from Hamilton?  His radio was broken, a mercy to all.   Kimi "leave me alone" Raikkonen was all over team radio too.

Team orders were out in force this weekend, although no one labelled them as such.   Both Mercedes and Renault played them, with Ferrari choosing not to.  Although would Raikkonen have his contract renewed if he overtook Vettel?  (Mr PSP wonders.)

With eight laps to go Di Resta retired.  Having never driven the car before.  This begs the question, why Williams didn't employ their test driver?  Or give their reserve driver track time before?

As the procession was nearly over, a couple of interesting points arose.  Was Hamilton going to give third place back to Bottas as promised?  He did.  Who would score fastest lap?  Alonso!

What have we learnt from this race weekend?  That Raikkonen's Finnish fans all speak English.

Brazil Banter - "Yep. Thanks guys."

I should be happy, this race saw the most coverage of Williams all year. If only there had been a Venezuelan grand prix too.

Especially for all the geekier participants in the league, there was lots of geeky chat during this race. Oh my, I could listen to DC and Brundle chat about how gearboxes could brake forever...but how will Sky do?

So farewell to free race coverage, farewell to the 2011 season, farewell to Barrichello (?) and farewell to that prize money happily resting in my bank account.

Brazil GP Charts

Chart of Lust

1. (new entry) Alonso's overtake on Button - made the race worth watching.

2. (new entry) Good luck - for Webber. At last.

3. (re-entry) Team radio - so we knew about Vettel's broken gearbox. Giving viewers a glimmer of hope for an interesting race.

4. (new entry) Vettel's helmet-cam - great shots even if they were a little wobbly

5. (new entry) Conspiracy theories - I might believe this one...Vettel had "ropey" (um hello, it lasted until the end of the race) gearbox, so that Webber is allowed a race win.

Chart of Loathing

1. (new entry) Senna's penalty - Massa and Hamilton did not go anywhere near each other. The stewards must have been bored. Let's hope Alex Wurz saved enough F1 loot to afford to be smuggled away from the track.

2. (new entry) Barrichello obituary - he's not dead. He hasn't even retired. Officially.

3. (new entry) Coverage of Sam Michael - is he wearing McLaren uniform yet? No And now? No And now? No.

4. (re-entry) Rain chat - on and on and the clouds never broke.

5. (new entry) Raikkonnen not going to drive for Williams - boooooooooo.

Brazilian GP and FINAL Results

1. Besta di Resta - 1,160

2. Glock, Stock and Two Smoking Constructors - 1,142

3. Still Chewing - 1,130

4. The Lord of the Wings - 1,102

5. The Pitstop Princess - 1,030

6. Trulli Scrumptious - 1,018

7. Gurning Rubber - 1,016

8. The Best Team - 1,010

9. Fuelled by Tiger Blood - 952

10. Must do better... - 842

11. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 839

12. Ferrari Fanatic - 655

13. Wheelie Wheelie Fast - 539

14. Hippy F1 - 480

Abu Dhabi GP Charts

Chart of Lust

1. (new entry) Sam Michael - clearly brings something to a team, nothing Williams wanted though.

2. (new entry) Macca - giving a bass to Vettel, doesn't the boy have everything he could want already? Send it this way please.

3. (re-entry) Big hugs - Pipsqueak and Alonso - whodathunkit?

4. (new entry) Movember - although, moustaches do look better on winners.

5. (re-entry) Special shiny helmets - twinkly, glitter versions for Vettel and Hamilton

Chart of Loathing

1. (new entry) All Williams back row - boooooooo, roll on 2012.

2. (new entry) Blue flags penalties - the fault is clearly the circuit and the rubbish leaders not the backmarkers.

Abu Dhabi GP - "so glad I could do this for you"

Pffff...what to say?

Abu Dhabi GP Results

1. Besta di Resta - 1,101

2. Glock, Stock and Two Smoking Constructors - 1,077

3. Still Chewing - 1,064

4. The Pitstop Princess - 975

5. Trulli Scrumptious - 963

6. Lord of the Wings - 960

7. Gurning Rubber - 957

8. The Best Team - 944

9. Fuelled by Tiger Blood - 897

10. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 809

11. Must do better... - 789

12. Ferrari Fanatic - 623

13. Wheelie Wheelie Fast - 509

14. Hippy F1 - 464

Indian GP - "You led every lap, pole position, fastest lap. Not bad."

Well, I was going to open with a comment about Hamilton being a penalty-magnet and then, shock of the season, Massa took the penalty. That didn't stop Hamilton being pretty despondent though (although given that particularly negative debrief he was given publicly over the radio, no wonder). Which was inappropriate really because all our sympathies lie with poor Karun Chandhok, who had been promised a drive at his home race only to be cruelly denied in favour of the hapless Trulli.

In the Ferrari garage, it's a surprise the mechanics have overalls, as their suitcases must have been full of front wings. On top of that, Massa doesn't seem to be learning from his mistakes.

At the end of the day, it was time, yet again, to watch Vettel (rhymes with "kettle") drink champagne from his trophy, taking the opportunity to try out a new celebration.

Indian GP Charts

Chart of Lust

1. (re-entry) Vettel's helmet - covered with his engineers, nicely done.

2. (new entry) 2 Torro Rossos in Q3 - remember you can replace the team name Minardi for Torro Rosso.

3. (new entry) Raikkonen to drive for Williams chat - too exciting!

4. (re-entry) Awful puns - such as Eddie's "A Paddock to India". Chortle.

5. (new entry) Hulkenberg - now sponsored by Katjes, the producer of my favourite childhood sweets! (Is this the money he's bringing to Force India next year for a seat?)

Chart of Loathing

1. (re-entry) McLaren's qualifying overalls - moving ever closer to romper suits.

2. (new entry) 2 US races soon in 2012 - I can see the days coming when there are no European races.

3. (new entry) Hamilton's hemlet - nothing says "India" more than Bob Marley.

4. (new entry) Brundles commentary - has he been saving "Who's vindaloo and who's korma?" all year?

5. (new entry) Lotus - for beating Williams. Sob.

Indian GP - Results

1. Besta di Resta - 1,056

2. Glock, Stock and Two Smoking Constructors - 1,037

3. Stil Chewing - 1,024

4. The Pitstop Princess - 945

5. Trulli Scrumptious - 933

6. Gurning Rubber - 921

7. The Best Team - 917

8. Lord of the Wings - 885

9. Fuelled by Tiger Blood - 837

10. Must do better... - 767

11. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 754

12. Ferrari Fanatic - 579

13. Wheelie Wheelie Fast - 456

14. Hippy F1 - 449

Korean GP - "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes and yes"

Or no.

Firstly, can someone tell me what are all these "difficulties" that Hamilton is suffering from? As far as I can see, he has a supportive network of family, friends and colleagues. He is driving the second best car in F1. He is loaded. Is it because he is......No. Is it because Button has had his contract renewed? Is it because whinge is his default state?

Changes to the build-up this race included no Eddie Jordan, which meant Jake had to find a different person to play with and Karun Chandock always talks sense. Approved. Unusually for this time of the year, there was no "whose going where" chat. Apparantly 20 drivers are lined up for the two seats at Williams, that must make us the most popular choice in the pit lane. Yay. I have decided that I prefer races that go down to the wire. It means we don't get endless "Vettel is champion" packages. Then, having seen far too much of him before the race, we saw nothing of him during the race.

My closing question to you all is what did Alonso's "I give up. I give up." message mean?

Until the next race, never mind the bollards.

Korean GP Charts

Chart of Lust

1. (new entry) Vettel praising the Renault engine - if Red Bull can achieve so much with it, just imagine what Williams will do!

2. (new entry) Hamilton on pole - just because he's not driving a Red Bull.

3.(new entry) Top 5 times - so close, makes it that wee bit more exciting.

Chart of Loathing

1. (new entry) Korea - why? Bring back one of the classic European races.

2. (re-entry) Tyre chat - booooooring

3. (re-entry) Clapping ladies - this time, nearly naked, enough now Bernie.

4. (re-entry) Trophy - or weapon?

5. (new entry) Red Bull's awful choice of music - money can't buy you taste.

Korean GP Results

1. Glock, Stock and Two Smoking Constructors - 985

2. Besta di Resta - 982

3. Still Chewing - 972

4. The Pitstop Princess - 889

5. Gurning Rubber - 886

6. Trulli Scrumptious - 877

7. Lord of the Wings - 847

8. The Best Team - 846

9. Fuelled by Tiger Blood - 785

10. Must do better... - 730

11. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 712

12. Ferrari Fanatic - 554

13. Hippy F1 - 431

14. Wheelie Wheelie Fast - 421

Japanese GP - "We took nothing forgranted and we did it"

Brundle "thoroughly enjoyed" the race, I'm not sure I concur. Perhaps it was the intermittent coverage and the fact that their was so much overtaking they couldn't broadcast it all.

Massa and Hamilton continue to rehearse their pantomime parts as sworn enemies. Altogether now: "He's behind you!"

I finished my viewing slightly disappointed by the lack of hugs, only a mere helmet pat or two.

Japanese GP Results

1. Glock, Stock and Two Smoking Constructors - 927

2. Besta di Resta - 915

3.Still Chewing - 914

4. Trulli Scrumptious - 819

5. The Pitstop Princess - 816

6. Gurning Rubber - 814

7. The Best Team - 802

8. Lord of the Wings - 800

9. Fuelled by Tiger Blood - 735

10. Must do better... - 682

11. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 655

12. Ferrari Fanatic - 528

13. Hippy F1 - 419

14. Wheelie Wheelie Fast - 406

Singapore slinging - "brilliant drive"

Hamilton and Massa's get-togethers were a small effort to enliven the race but even the twinkling lights couldn't make this year's event shine. Schumacher tried to make the race more interesting by bringing on the safety car, retire old man. Lastly, I must ask, Sebastian Who? Lots of chat about him before and after the race but nothing during.

Singapore Charts

A short version this week:

Chart of Lust

1. (new entry) Sparkling helmets - sported by Alonso and Vettel, glittering under the floodlights

2. (new entry) Fireworks - ooooooohhhh

3. (new entry) Safety car - it nearly brought about interesting racing

Chart of Loathing

1. (new entry) Talking about sweating - isn't this a polite, civilised sport?

2. (new entry) Alonso - letting the Pitstop Princess down at her hometrack. Epic fail.

3. (re-entry) Vetelle - it's "Vettel as in kettle"

Singapore GP Results

1. Glock, Stock and Two Smoking Constructors - 876

2= Still Chewing - 861

2= Besta di Resta - 861

4. Trulli Scrumptious - 774

5. Gurning Rubber - 772

6. The Pitstop Princess - 771

7. The Best Team - 762

8. Lord of the Wings - 753

9. Fuelled by Tiger Blood - 690

10. Must Do Better... - 649

11. Beauty & the F1 Geek - 580

12. Ferrari Fanatic - 490

13. Wheelie Wheelie Fast - 379

14. Hippy F1 - 377

Italian GP - "Thank you boys"

This race seemed to give one teammate great results and leave the other in the doldrums.  Webber crashed into Massa (why wasn't that investigated?) and will probably have to support race-winner Vettel now.  Barrichello was taken out by Liuzzi in the first corner, but Maldonado went from 14th to 6th on the first lap.  Button overtook Schumi given one chance and ended up on the podium whilst Hamilton couldn't get past him.  Rosberg was also a victim of Liuzzi but Schumacher went on to have a storming race, regaining some more of his previous notoriety.  Petrov, yet another Liuzzi victim but his team mate put the Senna name on the list of points scorers for the first time since Australia 1993.